By Susan Temple, MA, BCC, ACEP
The Oxford Dictionary defines joy as “a feeling of great pleasure or happiness.” It seems to me that joy comes to us in two ways. One is when something happens spontaneously that brings us a feeling of joy or pleasure. It doesn’t have to be something huge; I felt joy last weekend when I saw my 5-year-old granddaughter take the hand of my 1-year-old granddaughter to help her walk. The other way we can experience joy is by intentionally doing things or exposing ourselves to experiences that we know will lift our hearts and help us feel joy. For me, that is usually something related to music or other art forms.
When was the last time you felt joy? We often get busy with day-to-day life and forget to do the things that make our heart sing and add joy to our lives. Some of us may have even forgotten what it was that once brought us joy. And for some people, the word “joy” might feel too big, like it’s an expectation that can’t be fulfilled. If that is how you feel, consider using the words “pleasure” or “happiness” or even “delight” instead. Here’s a little exercise to help you reconnect with joy (or pleasure, happiness or delight) in your life:
Grab your journal or some paper and answer the following question for each decade of life you’ve lived so far, for example: ages 0-10, 11-20, 21-30, up to your current decade.
What brought me joy during that decade?
When you get to your current decade, ask yourself:
What brings me joy now?
Then answer these questions:
Are there any common themes throughout my life?
How many of my joy-bringers are still a part of my life?
Are there any past joy-bringers that I might like to bring back into my current life?
What makes that hard to do?
What is one tiny step I can take toward including more joy in my life?
Write one specific action you will take to include more joy in your life. When will you take it?
If and when you take that tiny step, notice how you feel. Consider when and how you can add these joy-bringers to your life more often.
I’d love to hear how this went for you. Email me at susan@lifecoachsusantemple.com if you try this out!